Opinion Women

Invisible women

We usually wake up to their existence when they don't turn up for work. And the first response is annoyance, because of the inconvenience caused to us. Films like Lakshmi and Me open our eyes to the plight of people who hold up our homes, writes Kalpana Sharma.

They flit in and out of our homes like ghosts in the night. They sweep and swab, wash and cook, look after our children, care for the elderly. Yet we know little about them. Most of us just about know their first names. We don’t know where they’re from, where they live, whether they are married, how many children they have, how many other homes they work in, what they earn — how they survive. They are virtually invisible.

We usually wake up to their existence when they don’t turn up for work. And the first response is annoyance, because of the inconvenience caused to us. Many professional women don the title of being superwomen because they manage jobs and homes — work life balance. But in fact the real superwomen are these silent workers, without whom few professional women in India would be able to function. Yet, while those in formal employment get sick leave, casual leave, privileged leave and weekends, our domestic help is not entitled to any of this. If she rests too long, she’s lazy. If she doesn’t turn up for work, she’s a shirker. It would appear that these women don’t have the right to relax, to fall sick, to have some fun. And of course, no one acknowledges that when they’re done with our homes, they still have their own homes where they have to do the very same jobs, sweep and swab, wash clothes, cook and take care of children and elderly.

A still from the film. (Picture from www.lakshmiandme.com)

Nishtha Jain, a Mumbai-based documentary filmmaker has done what all of us need to do. She has not just acknowledged that this silent worker in her home has a name, but she’s followed her life so that we see the person behind the name — a person just like any of us. And instead of viewing the woman from a distance, the filmmaker has bravely placed herself in the frame, honestly dissecting her own relationship as an employer. Lakshmi and Me is a remarkably honest documentary about 21-year-old Lakshmi and the filmmaker, Nishtha.

Demanding day

Lakshmi is typical of the domestics in Mumbai who work in several houses. They arrive at fixed time, rapidly complete the assigned tasks and move on to the next house. The only conversation with the employer is about the work — rarely anything personal.

But Lakshmi found that one of her employers was actually interested in her as a person, wanted to know her views, her dreams and ambitions. She wanted to understand why Lakshmi felt it was a curse to be born a woman. She wanted to know about romance in her life, about her family, her home, the traditions she followed. And to her credit, Lakshmi allowed the filmmaker into her life.

The film follows Lakshmi’s life, her daily routine of working in different homes, takes us to her own home, introduces us to her family and her perennially drunk father. We watch her fall in love and ultimately marry a young man from a lower caste. Her family disowns her. We feel Lakshmi’s sorrow when this happens as well as her happiness with the man she loves. And then illness strikes. We see her getting weaker and thinner. And yet she continues working. We witness the first months of her pregnancy. And yet she works. And we watch her struggle with illness and pregnancy in hospital.

Ask for more money, and you are guaranteed to lose your job. And there are plenty of others waiting to take your place.

At home, at work

Organising inside the home

In the name of servitude

What is most interesting about this film is the relationship between the two women, Lakshmi and Nishtha. The latter tries hard to overcome the class divide and the employer-employee relationship. She invites Lakshmi to join the crew for lunch and sit at the table. Lakshmi is embarrassed and amused. Later she tells Nishtha that she laughed because she thought it so funny that a ‘black’ woman like her should be sitting with ‘white’ people! And we claim colour is not an issue.

So, can gestures like asking our domestic help to sit at the table with us really bridge the chasm that exists between classes? Such gestures can have meaning only if they are backed with a genuine interest and concern in the person and recognition that they are human and have the same rights and needs as we do. And even then, we cannot be sure that decency and magnanimity on our part as employers will necessarily result in a comfort level where our domestic help feels at ease sitting at the same table as us. For, the divisions in our society, the place that each presumes they have in it, are so deep that it will take much more than such gestures to change things. But they could be a beginning and they could set a trend where we recognise and acknowledge those who provide us with such vital support.

Vicious circle

Another important aspect of domestic work that the film brings out is the crisis that befalls these women when they fall ill. Most of them continue to work until it is virtually impossible for them to do so. By then, their sickness has advanced to a point where they need urgent care. Yet the reason they don’t take even a day off to deal with health problems is because they fear that someone else will take their place. The reason they don’t demand a higher wage, or some additional amount for medical contingencies, is the same. Ask for more money, and you are guaranteed to lose your job. And there are plenty of others waiting to take your place.

Films like Lakshmi and Me ought to be shown on prime time television, in housing societies in a city like Mumbai, in schools and colleges (www.lakshmiandme.com / www.raintreeefilms.net). As a society, we are becoming increasingly blind and indifferent to the existence of people who hold up our homes, our lives, our cities. Such films should help open our eyes and our minds.

Filed under

Women

Cite this article

Kalpana Sharma (2008) ‘Invisible women’, India Together, 20 January 2008. https://indiatogether.org/invisible-op-ed/

6 reader responses

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  1. Bindu Milton · 21 January 2008

    Dear Ms Sharma, I really love the artcile. I am also a professional very much active in journalism with various English news papers till recent times. You have really expressed what I felt in my mind about the domestic helps. I have also employed one and share a very cordial relationship with her. Even though I can not follow her life I tried to understand her family background, family members and all. The documentary and the article address the life of thousands of such women in India.

  2. Tereza Coraggio · 31 January 2008

    Thank you for this article. In the U.S., I also came up against this internal conflict having a Latina housecleaner. I became friends with her, would clean with her, and went to her house at Thanksgiving. But a nagging disparity remained. Finally, I decided that it was unhealthy to be raising my kids with a servant mentality - believing that it was someone else's job (mine or hers) to clean up after them. We stopped hiring her (she had other offers, even for more money) and instituted one day when we all cleaned - from my husband to then 2-yr-old. 7 yrs later, my oldest is a cleaning fanatic, and we keep refining the system to bring my husband and the other two up to snuff. I think it's an important part of breaking the cycle.

  3. Edith Xalxo · 5 February 2008

    Thank you for this article. I have worked with this target group and I am still in touch with them also and I do agree with you . Thousands of girls from Jharkhand, Orissa and West Bengal towns and villages, lured by the prospect of decent earning, find themselves in Metro cities each year. The system operates through a well-oiled and efficient network of middlemen and agents, who bring the girls to the so-called placement agencies. They do not exist as a group and are difficult to reach, and to count. Their jobs are invisible as well. Moreover domestic work is unregistered and does not show up clearly employment, statistics in addition, since the status of a girl/ women living in the household may be blurred with that of the family. Domestic workers are especially disadvantaged since they are not covered by laws such as the Industrial Disputes Act, the Equal Remuneration Act, or even the Minimum Wages Act. A Domestic Workers (conditions of service) Bill was drafted as early as 1959 but was never enacted. The House Workers (conditions of service) Bill, 1989, was not enacted either. Thus their presence in homes does not show in census or household survey data to take appropriate steps to protect the socio economic conditions of the domestic workers. Especially the Underage girls who migrate to cities in search of work face a double threat in terms of physical social, economical harassment also.

  4. Susheela Kamath · 5 February 2008

    Dear Kalpana These inequities are the double standards that we often apply to people in more compromised positions. It is the hypocrisy of the 'have mores' towards the less fortunates. Wouldn't it be a good thing if each of us takes care of our domestic helpers, at least their health and general welfare needs with more sensitivity and understanding? How many of us spend unnecessary and vulgar amounts of money on designer clothes or fancy restaurants, yet crib when we need to spend on the health care of our domestic helpers. The word servant itself reeks of degradation. I prefer to call my house hold helper as my 'right hand'. It needs people like you to point put the travails of unorganised domestic helpers. I cannot wait to see the film.I feel vindicated that there are other people who care for their 'Lakshmis'. No lady has worked for me less than 8 years, in the past 37 years of my domestic life. I could work, to start with, because of the wonderful ladies who helped me do so, by making my life easier. Let us start by each one ,reaching out to one- our own domestic help. Let us start now in whatever capacity we can.

  5. Roop Rai · 17 March 2008

    Very well written article although it seemed somewhat an advertisement for the Lakshi and me film. :) Regardless, a good read. Thanks.

  6. Kaiser · 27 March 2008

    Dear Kalpana, There is another side - Indians by and large respond from the heart, and unless they are pressed by time or economic considerations , or afraid of being tricked, are very interested in other human beings, take a keen interest in others lives and are ready to help. In my experience all my friends and relatives have helped their helpers in numerous ways and are constantly helping them, whether it is for medication, medical treatment, loans,financial help, children's education. I often tell my foreign friends that in India though we do not have social securities the help comes from the heart by free choice. Let us not forget that and these large hearted Indians do not shout about their work but do it quietly, unselfishly. Kaiser